Magical Night

By Using the above picture which is more natural , i tried making something more unrealistic,imaginary and magical. It is done by using some simple tools and techniques in photoshop.

Hephzibah

Revolution in Education

Withstanding all the countless corruption in every existing institution, the most disregarded primary flaw begins with our very own education system. We have been brought up to believe that education makes us better individuals, alone and for the nation but this in reference to our current education structure is clearly another fallacy.

It is not in the interest of the education system to make the people mindful; rather it does just quite the opposite by limiting our knowledge to insignificant matters. Hence we never see problem solvers in the society. This is because the education system, from the elementary level to the integrated course, focuses on the extent of materials to be memorized precisely and have continually discounted the significance of valuable knowledge. To come to think of it, more than half of what we are taught throughout schooling by no means is applied or beneficial to us in practical life. Children are reluctantly fed myriad of historical, political and mythical stories, literature, linguistics and needless portion of science and mathematics. Confined subjective ideas are simply acknowledged while imaginative visions always dejected. Fields irrelevant to the dictated curriculum such as art, craft, music, dance and sports etc. are instinctively placed secondary if not discouraged. Liberal education has never been taken into consideration. And not to forget, with the increasing stress of examinations and competition; it’s turning out to be detrimental for a child’s unrestricted psychological and physical growth.

Also let’s not overlook the fact that education comes with a huge price today. Apart from just the fiscal view, a degree from a renowned university would either cost you the savings of your father’s 10 years of committed labor or buy you a loan debt for the next 5 years of your lives.

It’s high time, we sit back and should realize that our education system, just like any other institution, is profoundly influenced to lone serve the purpose of the monetary system which benefits only the elitist thereby imposing and conditioning common man to endless servitude.

Man has to evolve from his own ingenuity and our education system has been a complete barrier in attaining that. It has kept us ignorant for far too long and has obstructed young minds from free thinking and critical analyzing. The ramifications of which can be seen in our current society, a society full of war, destruction, poverty, insecurity, discrimination, greed, aggression, hatred and so on.

In a country especially like India, where knowledge is considered divine, one must think -what education has given us if it still hasn’t helped us “being human” and create a healthy sustainable environment.

Hence, one should be open to all kinds of information and ideas. Pay no or little attention to the media. It’s all biased. First and foremost create self-awareness. The internet is a good place to start since it gives a wider access to unadulterated information. Along with rejoicing over a degree and having a job security educate yourselves more about what really matters!

Lastly, in words of Jiddu Krishnamurti –
“There is no end to education. It is not that you read a book, pass an examination, and finish with education. The whole of life, from the moment you are born to the moment you die, is a process of learning.”

Abir Khalil

Drowning in Debt

This is a truth that we all turn away from. All credit card holders or anyone who has ever used a credit card knows how tempting shopping becomes with a credit card. Is it the feeling of having no limit, responsible for such greedy behavior, which pushes us to buy things we can't afford ? It looks like a credit balance would just make one more capable to do things but it is just hindering you in more ways than you can think.

Behind this evil stand not only all the big financial corporations but also the production companies, as they all benefit from this system.  Here i am not talking about the monetary system, even though i think it is a bigger evil than the credit system, i know it is going to take time to entirely remove money from this world. On the other hand we just can't wait for it to happen magically. We have to take continuous and strong steps from our sides too. 

We must strictly say no to credit cards. If you have a credit card please get a pair of scissors and cut that card into pieces. If you think it is good to have a credit card in case of emergencies, make sure you are strong enough to resist the mainstream market that is hell bent on filling your home with the useless low quality junk they make.

- Salman

Shayari

Kisiko pal ke liye hasakar
Zindagi bhar ki khushi aaj vaada na karna

Kisika pal mai haath thaam kar
Zindagi bhar ka saath aaj vaada na karna

Vaade tou is pal ke liye hote hai, Us kal ke liye nahi

Jiske aansu ki har wajeh kal aap hoge
Uske aansu humesha pochne ki aaj vaada na karna

~/)bir~

playingWithPhotoshop_v002

playingWithPhotoshop_v001

- Salman

playingWithPhotoshop_v000

This sketch was done by Bony, this is the raw photograph of the final sketch. Now through a series of posts we shall show you the limitless diversion of art styles that can be achieved using Photoshop.

- Bony

'Live'

All it takes to live life is,

a person who you could hold on to always,

something you love doing,

a pinch or a say a li'l entertainment,

a home to run to when your dismayed,

some good food to eat,

along with a drink for sure.

Then why all this drama?

why all this pressure?

why all this pain?

why this run ?

Stay still for while,

look around...

enjoy the beauty ,

look at people,

and be happy

for how unique each one is,

look at urself,

and be happy for what you are!

There is a lot to feel good for,

there is always a reason to smile,

maybe a smile on your face

could make someone else smile.

Life is too short,

hours and days run by,

weeks and months just go,

years just pass away,

and you find yourself gone,

this place would know you no more.

So make the most of it!

live life to make a difference!!

At least to make someone smile

with your presence,

so that when your gone ,

the sweet fragance still remains. :)

Hephzibah

Logo

What does logo mean ? A logo is basically a face of a company. A pictorial representation of what the organisation stands for. It has to be simple, creative and meaningful. Well not really it can be anything.

For ages we have been told how things should be so we went ahead and designed a logo which can be as versatile as possible. it can not only be integrated with other designs but also colors as it is translucent. We just wanted something which can be as crazy as we are ... and as time passes you shall be seeing it not only on the blog but in the streets too.

Now to describe our logo. When you see it first it just looks like a gas mask but when you look closer the top of the face is B.E. the abbreviation for barbaric expression.

To Russia with Love

We hold different values for different things. Sometimes we don't know the value of something we already have or something which we recieve without asking. We take things for granted and when we finally loose something, it is that moment where we realize the value of something. This pattern has been followed since the time we are born. Yet we continue to live this way.

We at barbaric expression recognize every thing that happens around us. We live and cherish every part of life. We value things regardless of our possession of it.

Now why am i talking about "value" ? Well, since the time our blog started. We have always had veiwers from Russia; and not just one or two but sometimes the highest count of viewers after India are from Russia. Now one might wonder why this would make any difference at all. Well it does. We shared our blog with people in India and other countries. We never shared it with anyone from Russia, yet we have veiws from the country. That means we have friends in Russia. We researched and learnt things about Russia to make art for our new friends. So this is our tribute to you.

- Salman

Ummm....RUSSIA!!! Well when one hears this six letter word so many things pop-up into one's head be it Revolution,Moscow,St.Petersburg,Architecture,Literature,Music,Ballet,Opera,Animation,Cinema so on and so forth.. its more of like," u name it and we have it!" Amazingly creative and also an enormously huge country.

The largest country in the world with a large population is considered a bridge between the Europe and Asia.This Dynamic country is full of Energy,Life and Potential and has never known to stay calm, be it revolution,or the world war,it has always been on the run.With such kind of intresting background, the people here are way too different from the masses or say the westners.Here is a generation where everyone wants to prove they are different but they are indeed different since here, life is quite unpredictable.

Russians are more like " to the point", very straightforward! They dont readily accept foreigners but they are very goodnatured with good mannerisms and quite a few superstitions.Well,to all the guys reading this post,there's some good news!Girls here are just too beautiful, you can't help but fall in love with them.

Art,theater,music and literature are so relevant and are also supported by the state because they were supposed to be the medium to convey political ideas.Well, there is a vast diffrence between the soviet Russians and the present one's but all of them love their country to the extreme and wouldn't take a word against it,so i suggest you don't put in a word of criticism if ever you happen to meet a Russian.

Though the people are multi-ethnic and have several regional languages, all of them speak the same language that is, Russian.So here, we see the 'unity in diversity' and while talking about Russian language who would forget Alexander Pushkin, the Shakespeare to the Russian Literature or say more than that.People here are highly educated with the literacy rate 99% and having a Ph.D in Russia is just a usual thing! Thanks to the constitution that offers free education to all the citizens.

The Architecture here is mainly Byzantine with many dooms and are brightly painted adding a vibrant look and energy to the country.

With Such kind of vibrancy here, entertainment is on a height! Infact,they have a special name given to the kind of folk music and dance they perform and is named "Barynya" which is very popular among them and now is globally spreading.They are also very active in the sports area,playing almost every kind of sport like hockey,soccer,basketball,tennis,skiing,skating among many others.

Well, now if i have to write more about Russia then i'm pretty sure there would be no end to it as i have already mentioned that life here is quite unpredictable and every new day has a new story to tell.

Hephzibah

Family guy, Matryoshka dolls

Matryoshka dolls are primarily Russian nesting dolls which in decreasing order of size fit into it's precedent. These dolls originally are made out of wood. So since we decided to do something special for our Russian friends today. I made 3d models of these dolls and put family guy characters on it.

I think they look funny.

- Salman

The Last Request

Please come.
I am alone here.
Nobody is talking to me.

Few are angry,
few scared,
few just dont want to see my face,
they say i dont look like i used to.

I too had a lot of dreams.
lot of things i wanted do.
now i can't
but would you ?

- Vipul

My river

We meet many people in our lives. We share different emotions with everyone. Few stick by and few, we let go. There are many names for these relationships that we have. Friendship, family, acquaintances, colleagues, school mates, class mates, neighbors and the list goes on to specific relations like mother, father, girlfriend, wife, brother, sister and on and on. So one thing is clear that as humans we need companionship.

I thought it would be a good idea to stress about the importance of companionship before i present the first post on this blog created by more than one person. The poem was written by Salman and the painting was done by Bony.

My river has dried
To wash away my sins, put off my fire
and live again .

- Bony & Salman

I miss my room !

Graffiti on wall.

This is an illustration where two pictures of my bedroom wall were put together in photoshop .... but what this really is ... it is me missing my room.

- Salman

The Road Not Taken

 

 Medium: water color on hand made paper

This is a painting created to show how we visualize the poem, written by Robert Frost(1874–1963).

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

- Bony

You wouldnt know what it is like to be me,

Coz i'm the craziest of the she,

acting like a bee,

trying to produce honey,

but end up being puny.

Stupid me!

Hardly cares to see,

that the world around me rather a sea,

enormous and scary to be,

but i would choose to be me,

dont you bother me!

So let me be!

I would rather face this than flee,

coz the fear thrills me!

And again i say ,

I am the craziest of the she,

so just lemme be,

the way i wanna be,

coz i wouldn't change for thee.

I was made unique to be,

so shall it continue to be,

if you dont agree with me,

I would say let it be,

I wasn't made for your glee.

Please dont lecture me,

I know it's for free,

but i beg thee,

to let me be,

the way I choose to be,

I may not be the perfect she,

but i choose not to be.

If you want me to be,

a friend to thee,

I would be,

but just dont expect me ,

to change for thee.

I dont mean to be,

rude to thee,

but i have made up my mind,

not to heed to thee,

I am glee ,

about whatever i have,

and whatever i dont,

coz i am meant to be ,

a unique piece

with none like me!

- Hephzibah

A Prologue...

Here's a Prologue written during a Writing challenge I've accepted -

---

In the darkness cast within forgotten crevices of a city bathed in light, a shudder electrified the air. A hum penetrated the silence, punctuating it and leaving in its wake a void that expanded across a ceiling.

The void was born of nothingness; as most voids are want to.

What began as a thrum of energized void the size of a pinprick began to grow until the darkness of the abandoned room shone bright in comparison to the patch of expanding void. The patch grew till it gaped open above the dust covered floor. The edges of this anomaly seemed to fold in upon itself, somehow caught between existing within this plane and another and incapable of deciding which it preferred.

Something stirred from within this void. One could tell because whatever had stirred had bothered to stick a scuffed shoe out of said void and with it kick around in the most experimental of fashion. This protrusion caused no irregularities upon the ethereal portal. Had there been an observer present, they would not have looked up at the ceiling and seen what the kicking foot belonged to. They’d have perceived nothing more than an oval outline around which one could make out blackness and of course… the kicking shoe.

Not for long, however. The shoe quickly retracted back into the void. The hum that had signaled the birth of the portal was heard once again. Now, the portal that appeared to enjoy a close resemblance with a black hole quivered. It did so visibly. Where it had once been nothing but a smooth… something, it now shone with iridescence too pale to cast light upon the floor below but just enough to see a ripple run across its surface.

In the darkness that occupied that forgotten room; in the darkness that sulked as its ego had been shattered by a passing anomaly, a figure emerged from the offending party. The figure emerged from the portal and was welcomed, as lovingly as a mother-in-law, by gravity.

A sound escaped the figure as it quickly met with gravity’s best friend – The ground. A cloud of dust engulfed the figure that had dared disturb its year’s long endeavor to form a uniform and well maintained carpet of indigence. An exclamation of pain was quick to wheeze away into a fit of coughing as the figure turned to see the tear in space that it had emerged from slowly collapse in on itself.

It looked like a bubble that had been popped, but instead of instantaneous disintegration, it chose dreamy implosion. Just like that the void disappeared, its life proving short but truly awe-inspiring. It also had the pride of leaving behind a memento… One that currently lay on the floor, encased in a thick overcoat and a cloud of annoyed dust, alternating mysteriously between coughing and groaning. Mysterious being the key word, seeing as the figure which was assuredly human was wrapped in enough cloth to dress a family of two and a half.

In the darkness that was slowly regaining its sense of self, the figure slowly stood up. Still coughing and moving in a manner that suggested a bruise in the making, it produced a matchbox from within the folds of its many layers of clothing and lit a single match. It looked around the tiny room with dark eyes outlined with suspicion and poorly concealed fascination.

“I can’t believe that worked…”

The darkness shrunk away from the light the matchstick cast across the room, stymied at its poor luck and hoping that it would be allowed to resume its quiet existence soon.

---

In a secret room hidden within a secret building not so far away as the ceiling invading figure would have liked (had it known such a room existed) a particularly severe looking woman stared at her particularly important looking screen and frowned a particularly furrowed frown. She wasn’t one to dally and quickly bursts into a flurry of multi-tasking the likes of which would have awed the most experienced of mothers.

A dispatch was sent out by the time the ceiling invader’s matchstick ran out.

This dispatch was read by a man whose severe expression and furrowed frown put the woman’s to shame. By the time this man had finished reading the dispatch and called for actions to be taken, the clothed stranger had shed his outer-attire and disappeared into the streets of a city so bathed in light, its darkness took its existence far too seriously.

---

And that's it, folks! This has been cross-posted from my own Blog where I generally touch upon topics pertaining to Game Design.

Fallen Fruits

Medium: water colors on hand made paper
- Manash

There are times when i wanna share,

but there's no one there.

There are times when i wanna cry aloud!!!

but i have no tear to spare.

There are times when i laugh out loud,

but there's no reason there.

There were times when i needed love,

and always had my mum to care.

There were times when i was in fear,

and i had my dad to hold me near.

There were times when i was lonely stuck,

but i had my friends to hold me up.

Well, i just understood that

this is LIFE!!

and with all it's ups and downs

I got to LIVE!

- Hephzibah

Halloween!

We pray the souls of the saints

rest in peace,

as the bonfires are lit,

for the Halloween!

Time when the leaves start falling,

and the lines between the dead and living start blurring,

with children guising and treating,

we enter into a whole new world of cherishing.

Streets filled with lights and lanterns,

craved pumkins and dressed up creatures,

homes full of candles and creepy spiders ,

sure a spooky feeling...

as the souls are held in abeyance

to meet the living.

But just as the night begins

when the sun sets

so also the day begins

as the sun rises

just as our hope never ceases.

We wish you a happy Halloween!

Hephzibah

Mosquito Helicopter- 3D Modeling

~/)bir ~

Happy Halloween

It is the trick-or-treat time of the year again. The festival where everyone dresses up in various costumes. Halloween truly has creativity written all over it.

I won't be going into much details of how the festival came to be, not because i don't know what it means(i read the whole Halloween page on Wikipedia),
because we believe in all festivals and celebrations regardless of where we come from.
For i believe that a complete Haunted theme, costumes, pranks and treats are just too good to miss.

So we wish everyone a very happy and joyous Halloween.

Nocturnal Illusions

walking past the storm,
light seems haze.
last hope to survive,
but found myself in a maze.
traveling through the earth,
sighting only the dark side.
as the colors fade,
covered by a blind faith.
still a long way to travel for life.
rain turned toxic,
sun rays scorching,
as i rest my eyes,
the sun disappears.
the moon screams out my fear,
again the dark night's here.
still frozen,
with hope to end, i find myself with no tears.

- TinTin

A Feeling of Freedom

Whenever i seek noise,

I like to steer through the wind

Whenever i seek silence,

I like to dive deep into the water

Whenever i seek freedom,

I sit on the top of a hill

Whenever i seek a smile,

I like to talk to the flowers

I am a free bird, can fly high into the air

Can discover heights

Can ignore the boundaries

Still has never seen a nightmare

I am what I am..

time is my slave

Emotions are my friends..

I am ready to start and set free to go on and on . . 

:-)

- |\/|ANISH

Dry Pastel Art

~/)bir~

Breaking the Darkness

This painting shows a man laying on the floor in front of a window. The light breaks through the panes and falls on his body giving rise to various patterns.

Here we can see how even in the darkest of times we can find hope. How even when we are completely broken, there is something that always pulls us. It keeps us going, It tells us that no matter what, there is no stopping.

Medium: Oil colors, Oil pastels on canvas.

-Manash

Happy Diwali

Diwali is one of the most popular Indian festivals. Everybody decorates and lights their homes. There are sweets, crackers and happiness all around on this special occasion.

It is celebrated to mark the return of lord Ram back to Ayodhya. This festival symbolizes the victory of good over evil, so on this day you would find the streets more brighter and beautiful. Joy and happiness on all faces. Parties and celebrations all around.

On this beautiful day we wish everyone a very happy and safe Diwali.

Concept guitar

Here is a guitar i made using autodesk maya.

If i were ever to play guitar in a concert, this would be my guitar.

- Salman

Perception Vs Reality

Photography by- Abir Khalil

You will be surprised to know what appears to be a sea here is actually just the amount of water that got collected in the midst of the desert due to the heavy rainfall in Saudi Arabia in the year 2008. The water didn't dry for until a month and the place attracted a lot of crowd. What was even more surprising is I saw people fishing! :D

Spirit of Time

This is a great platform to create awareness about issues we are oblivious to. Here is a very meaningful 5 min video to promote a global movement called "The Zeitgeist"The idea is to OVERTHROW the monetary system because it’s corrupt from the very foundation and transit into a more scientific, pragmatic and systemic society.

Remember we can always MAKE A DIFFERENCE!

- Abir Khalil

A Call For Awakening

(An interesting article by my brother that I wanted to share! )

Zeitgeist

In the 21st century, the information age, Man has evolved gradually with his own ingenuity. From the moment we wake up using our alarm clock to traveling using automobiles, to our diet which is now synthetically grown and produced, to our chair on which we sit, to the tap which is the source of water in our houses, to televisions, cell phones, iPods, the World Wide Web, are all marvels of technology. If one were to look, one would notice, it is the subject “science”, which has been responsible for such technological advancements. Man has been very well aware of this fact and yet he has chosen not to apply its benefits in designing the very society he lives in. The society that man has created is the reflection of his thoughts. Thoughts that man clings to based on ideas and beliefs, irrespective of how ridiculous they are. Therefore we see a society full of misery, greed and conflict. Man has accepted these aspects as a part of his life thinking they are predetermined by an external entity like God and failing to see that they are all emergent.

At present the society that we are a part of, is very ideological. These ideas range from economic, political to religious philosophies that hence give birth to dogmas, creed, rituals, traditions etc. What is obnoxious about these ideologies and philosophies is that these subjects are sturdily under the assumption that man is subservient to external entities and human mind(i.e. the thought process), while clearly ignoring the one obvious fact, that if we humans are subservient to anything, it is undoubtedly nature and nothing else. The implications of these absurd assumptions are disastrous because it hinders us (human beings) from evolving further and results in stagnation. And those who challenge the establishment are condemned, criticized and deemed unworthy irrespective of how relevant and intelligent their new ideas maybe. This has resulted in the formation of an education system that does not focus on the ability of the students to think critically, and instead encourages upholding existing traditions and institutions. It is indeed appalling!

The economic philosophies formulated by the greatest economists did not consider that we live in a world with finite resources. The entire paradigm's foundation is based upon the law of 'supply and demand' and the economic growth is calculated to a great extent on the basis of the consumption variable of the consumers. This, in economic terms is actually unsustainable in view of the fact that the resources we have are limited. So we see the subject in itself is contradictory! It is also against science because with more technological advancement, the more unemployment is foreseeable, which is a major nonconstructive consequence, as it diminishes the purchasing ability of an individual. There are various other aspects of this subject that are deeply flawed, but to keep the article short and precise, I would have to withhold its mention here. However I could highlight the implications of this subject on our society, few of which are wars, poverty, unemployment, diseases, socioeconomic stratification, laws, incarceration etc. In short, a society which is dysfunctional, uncivilized and deplorable!

This is where the subject science, plays a very contradictory and contemporary role when compared to other rigid ideologies. The beauty of this subject is, it is pragmatic and has no ego, thereby making the subject free from biases and opinions. The subject allows itself be proved wrong because it then takes the subject to a greater level of understanding. Having said this, is it not incredibly rational to let science decide what economic system should be applied in designing a society that would consider the well being of the entire world as a planet and all that which coexist. A scientific approach would be sustainable in every dimension of our existence.

Keeping the above in mind, there are certain ideas and concepts that have been proposed by an organization called The Venus Project which maintains scientific and technological understandings as its pedestal. This organization claims that our economy should be redesigned only on the basis of resources available unlike the current system that is run by money and politics. The monetary system is a false institution because money in itself holds no value and only acts as the purchasing power to obtain these resources. These resources are a common heritage to all of us but the monetary system favors only those who have money thereby making the entire purpose of life a struggle rather than to simply enjoy the sheer joy of being alive. Politics too, similar to money has no true relevance to society. From no perspective is it a representation of democracy because it serves those in positions of differential advantage. It is a dictatorship of the elitist; the financially wealthy making them inherently corrupt. Apart from that, the institution of politics and politicians themselves have no knowledge as to what makes our society and world function. Even if they were sincere, they lack technical capabilities. This institution like any other existing intuition, is another fallacy.

Since the institution of science has been the sole reason for everything that has improved our lives, why not let it be the governing body of our lives? Science has advanced to such an extent that most of the human chores could be automated which is the case anyways, from the industrial to the service sector like production of cars and ATMs respectively. If we scrutinize, 70% of the jobs that exist today have no utility except to keep the money rotating in the market, and with the absence of money there wouldn't be any need for such jobs like marketing, insurance, accounting, banking etc. They further go on to explain if technology is wisely and intelligently used with automation only 5% of the entire human population would have to contribute to enable the smooth running of the society, thereby creating enough abundance for the entire world, also keeping the best interest of the environment in mind. People would have access to each and every product that is available - for free, without submitting to employment. Now this doesn't imply that there wouldn't be any work but whatever little is required, would be truly relevant to run a society.
The question that now arises is, would we mind contributing few hours, let’s say once a month in contrast to the 8 hours that we put in everyday especially when all our needs and demands are being met. At present we have the resources and technological understanding to take our standard of living to a level so high that it is almost fantastical!

Man has sought happiness through materialism and if he were to stop and observe his life, he would realize that he is still as he was, with all the misery, greed, hate, envy, lust, aggression, anxiety and so on. Do we ever wonder who we really are and the meaning and purpose of our lives? We spend our whole lives seeking and chasing pleasure, gratification, financial and social security, trying to be somebody worthy enough to be accepted, fabricating the idea of a prefect life, which inevitably brings us to the point where we find our lives slipping away from our very hands irrespective of what we have done all along the way and yet we remain deluded thinking we could have done better. We have to come in terms with the fact that nothing is ever going to be enough and so we have to ask ourselves "What matters?"

If a revolution is to be brought about, it would have to begin with the human mind.

"The old appeals to racial, sexual and religious chauvinism and to rabid nationalistic fervor are beginning not to work. A new consciousness is developing which sees the Earth as a single organism and realizes that an organism at war with itself is doomed" - Carl Sagan

Omar Khalil

A step closer to enlightenment

Today when I look back, I must say I had a decent childhood, which is; I had parents who were financially sound enough to be able to effortlessly look after my shelter, clothing, food, education, personal requirements etc, and provide me with a fine environment. They brought me up to be well mannered and my worldly needs were taken good care off but when it came to me growing up as an individual, things got rather unpleasant. I had matured seeing my elder siblings go through the same phase and when they rose up, they faced the harsh consequences. I, like a spectator, then just sat back and judged that sometimes my siblings were misbehaving and sometimes my parents were overreacting. When I reached adolescence, things hadn’t changed much. I was often misunderstood which lead to regular tiffs with mom and dad, that then gradually became an issue I found unbearable. That’s when I realized no one is to be blamed. Every generation faces these problems. The system tells us, it’s the generation gap and part of growing up but I found it very unhealthy.

For me there were too many ends to meet, when it came to being religious or social, well educated to earn a good living and so on. There were expectations at every step and I was tired of trying to prove myself better in my eyes and in others by compromising on several grounds. And no matter how much I put in, it never seemed enough. I wanted to break free from all this but I just was not sure if it would be the right thing to do.

Science now proves that most people aren’t aware that what we believe understand and act upon today, is purely because of our nurturing and environment. And this conviction is in the sub consciousness so we do not realize that we just ‘believe’ in something, we are convinced we ‘know’. And that prevents us from seeing what really is. We don’t like to be proved wrong so we simply judge a new idea weather sensible or not, in terms of our credence and thus categorize the unaccepted proposal as a revolutionary thought.

Now I can comprehend that if our lives are run by anything its “ego”.

And by ego I do not refer to the most common definition that we all understand – “Appropriate pride in oneself; self-esteem, feeling of being superior to the other”

The other definition of ego that most of us are never taught is – The sense of oneself distinct from other selves.

If you see, now on our day to day basis, “MOST” of us are always trying to prove ourselves better than someone else. We do that because our current system focuses less on living and more on “survival of the fittest”. So the moment we reach an age to start contemplating things we are forcibly dragged into the system and trained to join the rat race. This false programming generates a constant fear of being run over or left behind if you aren’t better if not the best. And this fear and stress has overtaken “every “aspect of our lives and the most affected is our health and particularly our relationships whether it be with parents, siblings, children, friends, spouses, partners etc. Life has become more about pursuit of happiness rather than living for the moment. Our current system favors only the rich and powerful so we devote to affluence. And there is an invariable cold war persisting at all times amongst all the people we compete with. We lose our true selves in the course trying to be rich and powerful so that we are looked upon, to feel worthy enough to be accepted and respected. We derive satisfaction and seek happiness from materialism but eventually realize that prosperity in abundance did not create the happiness we were seeking. We fail to see that the race which we have unconditionally accepted to be our reality is actually just a race with our self. And till the time this quest is not put to an end there will always be a yearning for meaning.

Now, there are “SOME” who do not really take a vital part in the race. They compete till they can and then quit. They find it pointless to do what everyone is doing. We generally call them average and ordinary people. They come and go. Who wants to be ordinary? But what we miss out is although they do not want to prove any point they are being “different”. And they too are trying to understand and figure life out on their own.

Everybody likes to be different because everyone wants to stand out. But what we don’t notice is that, if everyone is trying to be “DIFFERENT” then everyone is trying the “SAME” thing.

It’s evident we ALL want to be recognized for being alive! So once man questioned his existence and purpose in life and because he had no definite answer he started describing himself in ways that seemed relative to him neglecting that what’s relative is never absolute.

We all want an identification to feel recognized as a separate entity. And what gives us an identity? Well, if you see as a kid we are brought up with the “belief” that we ‘’belong’’ to some sex, some family, some class, some culture, some religion, some community, some society, some country so on and so forth. Now observe how everybody is trying to be recognized ONLY by their identities and everyone just tries their level best to live up to it. This very “belief” in identity is so resolutely etched in our minds that we fail to acknowledge any new concept that does not go in sync with the above mentioned categories. These classifications merely give us more reasons to judge a person and then treat him in view of that. And generally, only people with common identities and ideas tend to recognize one another, while reject people with dissimilar identities. This results in mounting up in groups, creating division and bigotry. So you see how the very idea of an identity is what creates a sense of separation. And that is the “ego” I am referring to that most of us live with without even realizing.

Now, some people like I, have suffered the consequences of these differentiation and discrimination. I questioned the reasons behind all the misery and suffering in this world. And I tried not to look for the answers from my past teachings, beliefs or knowledge; I sought the answers from observation and analysis. This is termed as critical thinking.

Keeping our ideas and beliefs aside, if one asks “Who are we?” The only substantiate answer is —– We are ALL a consciousness present in a human body that takes birth and is bound to die which means from a conscious point of view we are all the same!

Now while we exist in this human body, the only things we are subservient to is the environment, nature and all that coexists because without it we wouldn’t be. And by nature I don’t just mean the 5 elements, trees and animals, by nature I refer to this ENTIRE paradigm, the universe, the billion galaxies, the milky ways, the solar systems, the planets, earth and all that’s within. This impeccable, balanced, astonishing, beautiful design is GOD to me. I understand God is the creator and the creation Himself and that is what I entirely submit to. Once we humans have this realization, the only “thing” that would truly matter is our “existence” in this very profound design and we would use nature’s intelligence to be innovative problem solvers ensuring our lives to be as perfectly beautiful and harmonious as could be.

I would also like to bring your notice to the fact that I was born in a Muslim family and I tried my best practicing my religion Islam. Although I started doubting things relatively at a very early stage, my thoughts were only growing more webs. I couldn’t really figure out what was wrong but I knew something was definitely not right! I searched for my answers starting with questioning my religion. I tried to learn a lot by watching and reading numerous talk shows and books respectively by renowned scholars but it was just not enough. Some questions were yet unanswered .That’s when it occurred to me and I realized that I was taking peoples word for the truth. Everybody is gifted with the intelligence and it does not make sense why one should take someone else’s perception of religion or life as to be his. So I let go of everything I held on to, to seek GOD/TRUTH/MEANING/PURPOSE of life and now I finally know! And it’s beautiful!

Success isn’t anymore about how many people look up to you, or achieving an educational degree, or the designation in the field of your work or your social and financial status. It’s about being able to see the disguised truth and work towards it as one.

~ Abir Khalil ~

Kaun Apna Kaun Paraya

Jise apna samjha tha
Ab unhi ki parchaiyo ko dhunda karte hai hum

Jise paraya kaha tha
Ab unhi ki saaye mai jiya karte hai hum

Rishtey ke in rango ko kaun tasveer par utar sakta hai

Jise zindagi maana tha
Ab unhi ki yaado ko dafnaya karte hai hum

~/)bir~
(Dated: 2007)

Did you know....

If you were God people would stone you
But you are the devil I bow and worship staunchly
If you were life everyone would rather die
But you are the death I live daringly
If you were truth no one would believe in it
But you are the lie I always speak naively
If you were love people would just learn to detest
But you are the hatred I fell in madly
If you were blessing all would escape it
But you are the curse I cast on myself duly
If you were bliss people would drown in tears
But you are the soreness I heal my wounds with tenderly
If you were light people would be blind
But you are the darkness I see through clearly
If you were blood everyone would bathe in it
But you are the water I can stake my life for valiantly
If you were treasure everyone would bury you
But you are the junk I hunt earnestly
If you were the world it would perish
But you are no soul in which my heart rests peacefully

~/)bir~
(Dated: January 2008)

Time

Time, something in which the world exists
Which no one knows when initiated or will cease
Because here ‘when’ again speaks about time;
So life is a mystery and time secrecy
But time rules life not life time
It was time that once drew us apart
It is fate that now has got us as one
We were friends then, we are friends now
The road just ended and started again somehow
In the midst of the end and the start
There was once more time playing a part
Time that let me breathe my way
Time that carried you up so far
Remoteness did spread but not we felt
Distance that crept was sure so existent
Because we then were looking for tracks
Now we built our own to leave a trail behind
If we held hands back in time it was a diversion
Today we hold hands merely as in thoughts
Making a connection that does not enshroud the reality
A bond that looks like glass but to sense is rigid
Our perception so far from sensuality
Drowning still living in purity
Makes every moment in time a time we want to pause
Weave time if I could to make it eternity
And yet again forever and time clash
Inconsistent are we humans too
Failing to comprehend our own obscured desires
When they emerge after being concealed
Sightless to the colors they have been refined with
We twist them with our own eerie notions.
You and I swirl in the mist of bliss
A sense that gives us completion
But life wasn’t pledged without grief
And sharing it we share our lives.
Bathing you with my pearl drops
And understanding the silence that you speak
You bring back the deceased to me
Speaking right to my heart passing over my words
Awaiting to hear the unspoken
That to be done does like enchantment
I sit marveling if I knew you at all
Time passes by, not responding my query
Angels most often stopover inexplicably
Leaving behind an aura of faith and devotion
You are too good to be true but not like seraph
I want to deem I really have you with me
Without skeptical delusions of you fading away
Cupids arrow did hit us but not wound
Curbing the restricted where the world lunges in
Time did make up for keeping us estranged
But now the unique intimacy between us
Shall only fade when time shall

~/)bir~
(Dated: August 2006)

Unrealistic Reality

I was scared falling abruptly in the pit
But there was a sense of contentment
Indulgence was something I quiet experienced then
Always did what I badly sought not
Deprived from ecstasy in my usual tedious life
Life which I wasn’t geared up to concede
I became a soul so lack of vim and vigor
Even the slightest wind would carry away
But always the appalling wind did blow
Maybe this one wasn’t so atrocious after all
It promised me hope and buoyancy
Telling me there would be an end to it
Something I was seeking for desperately
Blindfolded to the world’s light
Here in the pit the dark seemed illuminating
Underrating my life I deserved life not
My heart only the size of my fist
Clogged so much emotions that I never released
Was gradually becoming a burden for me
Putting out the fire of my heart with my tears
And burying it all somewhere I too can’t find
I found it soothing it would come to an end shortly
Out of nowhere I suddenly hear a tune
A voice that had tenderness in it
It sang to me when I was descending
And I kept drowning in its rhythm
It said the pit was bottom less
The gratification was nothing but illusion
The darkness here would grow only shady
Beget that what I was trying to break away from
For a moment it showed me my fears
The fears I never came across but that just resided in me
Doubts that weren’t there but I still questioned
Powers I had but was guilty unduly
Love that was breeding but I never set free
Hatred that was extinguishing but I wouldn’t let it
The feeling of melancholy did start to fade
The voice was conquering me from everywhere
Blocking my pessimistic thoughts
It showed me hope not which I had been seeing then
But a hope that I really needed to see
I had to perceive it is hope that keeps us stirring
And living with hope is better living without
I felt my self tremble for a while
And then I was soaring up above in the blue
The world’s light was tearing up my sight
It was a feeling words cannot describe or portray
Something everyone I believe should feel once
To appreciate their life knowing there’s more to it than seems
I feel like I have been born new
Seeing things from a point I never knew existed
But now I often wonder if reality was unreal
Or unrealistic effects I saw as in real
Because the tone that endowed me with life
Is a rhythm I can never disregard
A voice that was impossible to restrain
And now when it plays on my mind
It’s a language I never learnt or ever heard of.

~/)bir~
(Dated: August 2006)

Dear Life

Dear life...

You want me to tell you the color
In spite of knowing I am blind
You want me to fly and soar high
How do I tell you my wings are broken?
You want to see how I run
And here I am finding it hard to stand
You want me to show you the path
Only if you knew it’s me who is lost
You want me to judge between right and wrong
But would you tell me what justice is?
You want me to smile all the time
What’s the point when there are tears behind?
You want me to learn what love is
Isn’t that something I am trying to teach you?
You want to be the world for me
But for you I am to be just me
You want me to practice to be perfect
If none is perfect why even practice?
You want me to look for a corner
And then lock me up in a circle room
You want me to help you build your dreams
And then force me to break them alone
You want me to wait for something
Something that isn’t suppose to arrive at all
You want me to keep my promises
But only your promises are made to be broken
You want me to get something beyond my reach
When I somehow manage to; I am always too late
You want me to build castles
But after I do I see it’s in air
You want me to always understand you
And you never make an effort on the contrary
You want me to understand your silence
But you become deaf when I scream
You want me there when you don’t even want me
But you are never there when I need you
You want me to like what you like
But you easily hate what I love
You want me to seek the happiness in you
What about the sadness I hide in me?
You want me to think you expect less
But I am the one who has just been giving
You want me not to be so demanding
Am not I the one who always just asks?

Would you still tell me....''thats life''

~/)bir ~
(Dated: August 2006)

Unleashed Love

I walk into the empty house
And all memories start to arouse
I hear the laughter and taste the tears
And think about our little fears
I miss those moments of bliss
And the way we used to kiss
I look at the things on the ground
That makes me feel he is still around
I glance at the picture bedside our bed
The one when we painted the whole town red
I admire the couch where we first made love
And felt heaven was right up above
I shakily sit on the floor
Trying hard to cry no more
I come here a year after the chase
And surprisingly find everything in place
I clutch his jacket that lay beside
And sensed the love he couldn’t hide
I stand in front of the mirror with a face
That in these 12 months had lost its grace
I brush away the dust that settled on my ring
The one he gave me on our wedding
I close my eyes and keep them tight
Recalling what all happened that night
I remember his warm blood in my hand
And the only thing around I found was sand
I ran here and there looking for someone
Only if I knew he needed me but no one
I come back and see his eyes had shut
A message written on the sand with blood
I regret not hearing his last words
But knew they were ‘kill those bastards’
I kept every word he said
Shot them all right in the head
Now I stand where he lay dead
The night when we had fled
I cut my self setting my soul free
Knowing he is out there somewhere waiting for me

~/)bir~
(Dated: September 2004)

The Key In Me

I wake up one morning
To see my room filled with glee luster and love
A bliss that promised not to drown
A glimmer that would never quiver
An affection that I would always venerate

I gently walk up to my window
I see dark clouds over casting my elation
I see the joy at one side
But to the darkness I confide

Wickedness that was suppressed
Was freed from its cage
Disillusioned my mind
Said the darkness was rapture
Where rest I would find

I evoke the bliss drown and drown
I wobbled the glimmer that day forever
I sullied the affection and destroyed it whatsoever

Now I keep striving in the darkness
Thinking it is the only way to happiness
I grow frail day by day
And let it poison my mind in everyway

Out of the blue under the door
I see light streaming in
I manage to stand and reach the door
But see darkness crawling….darkness crawling

I stumble in another room
Where evil resides with a smile
It whispers ‘don’t even think
Because here is where now you will sink’

Auspiciously I see the light yet again
And drag my self to it
And once more I see my self
In a room with sin and malevolence

A thousand doors I must have opened
Just to take the glimpse of my loss
But every time I try to rise from it
I find myself more drowning in it

Unlocking evil is locking serenity
A lock that has a key but lost
Or perhaps a key that doesn’t exist
Or exists but just within me

Yes it exists….but just in me………..

~/)bir~
(Dated: August 2003)